HE abandoned you but you're rejecting ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 This article is actually an update to, " When The Family Suffers".For those of you who are unfamiliar with the last article, I will try to catch you up to speed with a condensed version.My oldest brother kept an 18 year old secret that would rock my family's foundation to its' core.That secret was my 18 y.o. niece who I'll refer to as "Regina".(She apparently was concieved 6 months into his marriage,out of an extramarital affair.) At this time he already had a newborn with his wife,well a 15 month old child, who fast forward to today is 20,soon to be 21. With the background firmly laid out for you,I'd like to bring you to the present day.
  I was not sure how to go about this chance meeting,but I knew in my heart that I couldn't allow another day to go by and this child (young lady) not know the love she had awaiting her from her newfound aunt and granddad. I ultimately decided to make initial contact via an internet networking site. With her personal  contact info made readily available, I decided to pick up the phone, hoping in time we could build a bond that family was made of;A bond that could overlook the 18 years of damage caused from my brother's abandonment.
 We decided to meet a week later and the stage was set. I was pleasantly surprised by her absence of reserve in agreeing to meet me.My kids were overjoyed,especially my daughter, as she had imagined she had a new teenage play mate for which she could emulate and become buddies with.However the reality would soon become something different entirely.
 The day of the planned meeting arrived and you could cut the nervous tension with a knife.Most of the conversation took place between her mother and myself,because she was quite guarded and angry.Her mother often interjected,prodding her to be more engaging,but to no avail.When I left the visit, I was hurt and confused.Hurt because she wasn't running to me with open arms.Hurt because she was taking out her abandonment issues that my brother caused on ME.Confused because if she really didn't want to meet me or was going to treat me like that,why did she even agree to meet with me? I didn't want to overwhelm her,I didn't want to push too much on her at once....I just wanted to be her auntie and for her to act like my niece.
 I have counseled with dear friends in hopes of better understanding this phenomenon,from the perspective of the neglected child, but it's still hard to wrap my head around. I understand that she may feel that we "the family" could have influenced  my brother to make other choices other than to deny  her, or maybe she's wondering where were we the past 18 years and why are we coming out the woodwork now?. I get that.But what I don't get is how she doesn't understand that, I am not my brother's keeper!